So last two years we had two things to fix. First was that I went out to start her and she wouldn't. Turn the key and just a slight clicking sound. Cody comes over. "Let's try jumping it" says he. "Got a screwdriver?" Of course. He takes said implement from me and proceeds to stick said hunk of metal into the engine compartment where I can't exactly see what's going on. All of the sudden sparks start flying everywhere, but she starts!!! Okay, that's frightening. He shows me how to short out the solenoid and says "Congratulations, now you know how to steal a car!" YASNIL. Seriously YASNIL. Try replacing the solenoid. Did. Didn't help. Still have to jump her to mow the lawn. I get smart and cut and bend a piece of battery cable instead of the screw diver. Fits better and doesn't accidentally arc weld the engine housing if you accidentally catch it in the process. Yeah, that happened. Head to the auto repair place next to work and ask what I can hook up to create a jumping situation without having to reach into the engine compartment and risk hospitalization for electrocution and a nice long vacation in the burn unit. They sell me a push button switch and some wire. Wire it up. Try it. No joy. Try it a little longer. Smoke. Inspect the wires. They're melted together. Okay that didn't work. Turns out it costs $50 bucks to get a switch that will handle the appropriate amount of volts/amps. Okay, not putting that much into it. We'll stick with jumping.
Second thing that needed fixing. Jump her. Still scared by this after several months, but we're limping along. Pull her out and engage the blades. Snap. She dies. Drop the blade engage lever. Jump her again. (Did I mention this still skeebs me out?) Engage the blades. Dies. CODY?!?!!? Looks like the safety switch that tells the electrical system that the blades are engaged has gone bad. Easy solution. Bypass the switch that tells the electrical system that there's someone sitting in the seat. The safety feature put there to ensure that if you fall off, the blades stop. Sure enough, just like he said, she "works" again, she just won't stop if you fall off/roll over. Did I mention we have a bunch of hills? Why is the woodchipper scene from Fargo playing in my head?
Around this time I start describing to L what I go through every time I need to mow, risk of electrocution and dismemberment and such. I think I mentioned somewhere in the beginning that riding lawn mowers are expensive (gotta bring it around full circle). She hesitates for a few months, but finally helps me pick out a new one. She does all the research about what we need, turning radius, transmission, etc. and picks out a Cub Cadet. We head to Home Depot and pick him up. The Cub. Oh man, I'm mowing the yards in half the time Smokey took. Best of all, I'm not worried about serious bodily injury (okay it is still a riding mower, I'm cautious) every time I have to mow. To truly complete the circle, L posts an add on Craigs List. Jump her for the last time, and drive her on to the guys' trailer. At times I'm kind of a sentimental guy. I'd like to say that I shed a tear as they pulled out of the yard. While I'm grateful for all I've learned and the help I've received (seriously grateful, still owe Cody tons of barbecue), I'm just stoked about my new mower.
